She didn’t believe me.

She spoke to me in a calm soft voice. Asked me questions. Respectful, complimentary (why yes she is cute and yes she is loving) and disbelieving.

Natalie Merchant says it best:

Doctors have come
from distant cities
just to see me
stand over my bed
disbelieving what they’re seeing

ask intimate questions
want confessions
they reach into my head
to steal the glory
of my story

I’m a challenge
to your balance
I’m over your heads
how I confound you
and astound you
to know I must be one of the wonders
of God’s own creation
and as far as you can see you can offer me
no explanation

Larkin was sick on Monday showing signs of a cold. Colds in general are not easy on a kid but this kid – well she takes it to another orbit. We have a deep suction machine at home. Kinda like your dog when you drop food only this one sucks her snot out. It’s AWESOME! Best thing ever invented and put in your hospital room but then someone had the SUPER idea that maybe parents could actually use this machine at home to manage a child’s snot ALL ON THEIR OWN! Who KNEW parents could be trusted. We manage this child very well. Health wise she confounds everyone who doesn’t see her on a regular basis.

Thursday I know the cold has moved into her chest. I can hear it. She could do the BEST Bea Arthur voice right now if only she could talk. What fun I would have with THAT!! Friday the throwing up starts. I manage it. I am used to it. I watch her carefully because vomiting creates a slippery slope (HAHAHAHAHHAHA) but no joke – it’s a thin line between catastrophic and getting to the hospital in just the right time.

Keto Kids (see 4 million other posts for Ketogenic diet explanation) already have “sour” blood. Bicarbonate levels are checked when she is sick to ensure they don’t fall below 20. I know from the experience of staying calm, laid back and managing her well at home – that sometimes I manage her too well. When she begins to vomit to the point that she can’t keep anything down, I have about a 2 hour window to get her to the hospital. Enough time to throw things together, get Chase covered and get myself dressed or showered cause typically I don’t see my own shower for a week when this stuff happens.

I called ahead to see what doc was on call. See subject title for her name. She has never seen Larkin. I know her name and I know parents who like her. I have no choice cause I aint sitting in the ED – been there done that and will avoid it. We scare the crap out of them every single time the second I say the word seizure. They will admit her just because I said it. Sometimes that isn’t what she needs but I digress.

We sat in the waiting room. Trash can – throwing up into it. I sent Andy home right then. Go home and pack us up in total and bring her medications. We know what is coming as we have done this about 5 times since last October. Thank you to the kind mother who brought me a box of tissues after Andy left. That was probably the kindest gesture EVER. I know it’s gross watching someone else’s kid throw up in the waiting room but you, as a mother and human being, could see I needed an extra hand.

She didn’t believe me. I am very calm. I am very articulate. I am very aware of this child. She’s vomiting. She has only done that for about 2 hours (notice my window timing 🙂 I am SO proud) and she didn’t appear dehydrated. Checks Larkin over. BUT she never looks at her feet or hands. Larkin’s hands are mottled blueish and purple at this point and they are cold. I know this. I know this is a sign. Larkin has a slight fever of 101. Larkin averages around 97.4. I know this. I know this is a sign. She checks her ears – pause here for me laughing hysterically inside because I know this chick aint NEVA gonna see this child’s ears. She wants to do a tempanogram. Pause here again for me laughing hysterically inside. Larkin fails these on a regular basis. Whatever. I don’t care at this point cause doc has to do what she’s gotta do. Based upon the failure of the tempanogram (SHOCK) she decides Larkin has fluid in her ear, wants to know what antibiotic she can take and this is the cherry on my sundae – what pharmacy would I like that called into.

Now I know she seriously doesn’t believe me because this chick honestly thinks she is going to send us home on meds and CURE it. I don’t know what antibiotic she takes because we have only taken them once orally at home. Typically Larkin has already been admitted at this point, IV started and the antibiotic goes into the IV and it aint one you take home kids. Doc looks up what Larkin needs – calls it in and I smile. She asks if I need anything else.

I said calmly, quietly, although I am almost in full tilt – will you please pull a lab on her and check her bicarbonate levels for me? That way I can rest easy when I take her home. Mind you Larkin has continued to vomit in her office the entire time. Doc smiles that sweet, calm, I’ll pacify mom smile and says “oh sure and orders it in the same breath. I know she thinks I am wrong. I know she is waiting to come into our little room in another hour and tell me everything is fine and to go home. She even had me doubting myself so much that I sent Andy to the pharmacy to pick up the antibiotic. (anyone need some cause I have a full bottle)

Hour. Doc comes in. “Her bicarbonate level is at 16 and dropping” Mom “what do you think doc?” Doc “well…I think Keto kids are scary” Mom “well how about I tell you what I think – I think she needs an IV and some antibiotics in the IV” Doc “yes I agree we will get you a room” Mom “thanks” Doc “what level does she need to be at to be ok” Mom “she needs to be over 20” Doc “thanks”

She is getting better. She fell asleep around 1 this morning. The ENT team came up to get the IV in with a doppler. HOW COOL IS THAT??!! She is resting. I am venting.

Lesson – NEVER NEVER EVER QUESTION A MOMOLOGIST. ESPECIALLY ONE THAT TEACHES IT FOR A LIVING.